Taste Your Talk; Tame Your Tone

By Donna Faughn       Many years ago I developed a lesson to present at a Ladies’ Day entitled “Ten Commandments for Christian Women.” I used it multiple times at different places and it was almost always well received.  Obviously, it was not all-inclusive because the Bible contains many commandments for both men and women.  I simply selected 10 that I thought would be most helpful to women in particular.     The title of this post contains two of those commandments given by God. Oh, He doesn’t say them exactly like that, but he does teach the principle. I selected these two to write about in this post because of what I’m hearing (or reading) from Christian women. Election season is not known for being a time when people taste their talk or tame their tone!     I also am NOT saying that we should sit quietly by and never express our opinions concerning those running for public offices whether it be local, state, or national in scope. As citizens of this country, we should be concerned with who our leaders will be. However, we need to realize that how we say what we say can damage our influence on others.     Concerning talking to others vocally, we need to think about how our words taste as they exit our mouths. Would they be considered bitter, or sour, or foul tasting, or would they be sweet, mellow, or pleasant?     Colossians 4 is a great place to learn about tasting our talk. It begins with verse two, but for my emphasis, I want to zero in on verse 6: “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person” (emphasis added).     James 3 has another interesting lesson about our tongues. It teaches us that the tongue can direct (vs 3,4); it can destroy (vs 5,6); and it can delight (vs.9a, 10a). The text continues with these words: “From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.”     We really need to learn how to taste our talk, especially when we are discussing current events.     But what about how we say certain things? I’m talking about the tone in which we say things. Do we really realize that the tone we use when speaking can change the way it is taken? We’ve all heard examples of the same words being said in different tones of voice, and depending on the tone, an entirely different message is received.     I often think of Jesus when He was tempted by the devil following Jesus’ lengthy fast. I imagine Satan using a condescending tone as he tempts our Lord, but I doubt that the answers Jesus gave were said with any tone but quiet “matter of factness “ (if that’s a word). He depended on the word of God when he said “it is written…” Even in Matthew’s account (Matt. 4:1-11), when Jesus told Satan to “Be gone,” I doubt that those words were spoken harshly. I can hear a calm answer clearly spoken. His tone would not cause a dispute.     Now when I think of the tone I sometimes use, I wonder what message I am sending.     We need to learn to tame our tone.     But we need to consider one last line of communication which we deal with on a daily basis. Our words go out over the internet daily, and because the recipients can’t hear how we are saying those words, or see our facial expressions, or see our body language, we must be extremely careful about the words we use online. Derogatory pictures or memes, accompanied by our comments, can be very damaging to our example as Christians. We simply must taste our talk and tame our tone!     When you express your opinion face to face or online, be sure you check your words and your tone. “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” (Prov. 25:11)

- Donna Faughn is the wife and mother of preachers and is a frequent speaker at women’s events. She is a member of the Central Church of Christ in Paducah KY.  She may be contacted through the congregation's website: http://www.centralchurchofchrist.org