For those of you that watch football and know what these terms mean this might be funny:
Quarterback Sneak – Church members quietly leaving
during the invitation.
Draw Play – What many children do with the bulletin
Halftime – The period between Sunday school and
worship when many choose to leave.
Benchwarmer – Those who do not sing, pray, work, or
do anything but sit.
Backfield-in-motion – Making a trip to the back
(restroom or water fountain) during the service.
Staying in the Pocket – What happens to a lot of
money that should be given to the Lord’s work.
Two-minute Warning – The point at which you realize
the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up
your children and belongings.
Instant Replay – The preacher loses his notes and
falls back on last week’s illustrations.
Sudden Death – What happens to the attention span of
the congregation if the preacher goes “overtime.”
Trap – You’re called on to pray and are asleep.
End Run – Getting out of church quick, without
speaking to any guest or fellow member.
Flex Defense – The ability to allow absolutely
nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.
Halfback Option – The decision of 50% of the
congregation not to return for the evening service.
Blitz – The rush for the restaurants following the
Highway Church of Christ, Sullivan, IL Visit
their website as http://www.highwaycofc.com
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